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Spring Break

Wow, what a week. Being in St. Louis is fun, of course, probably mostly because I’m not at school. At the same time, it’s brought to light some things that are at best unpleasant and may actually be harmful.

Irina and I were talking the other day about how most people are alone and might not even be aware of it. I know that I’ve always felt a very acute sense of isolation from other people, but lately I’ve been feeling something else. It’s an actual physical pain, like there’s a weight pressing on my chest. It’s become especially pronounced during these days at home, and I somewhat naively thought it could be love, an emotion I’m not entirely sure I can feel. Last night, however, my thoughts (and more to the point, my feelings) came to a head and I recognized it for what it is. Being alone has never bothered me before; in fact I frequently prefer it to the company of other people. This new feeling is something entirely different. I feel lonely.

Broze Yuri: I need sex

Broze Yuri: and companionshiop

Broze Yuri: and love wouldn’t be bad

Broze Yuri: heh

Terrill Sean: in that order?

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