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Get Down with the Sickness

I’m sick.

As I was lying in bed delirious with fever it occurred to me that maybe there are still people wanting to read this, so I might as well say something.

Anyway, Yuri called a few minutes ago and we reminisced about high school. It got me thinking about how many parts of our lives aren’t involved with day-to-day living. Par ejemplo, until this week I don’t think I had ever seen a Playboy. Lest you get the wrong idea, I have my obligatory high-school-fundraiser subscription to Maxim. The point, however, is that this week I was exposed to Playboy in three different ways. I realize that it’s a mundane coincidence but it makes me wonder about other things too. For example, today I accepted my internship offer at Oak Ridge for this summer, and also got a call from Wal-Mart wondering when I could work this summer.

I’m not really sure what I was getting at there, except that some more significant, albeit less topical, coincidences lead other people to see the work of a god or gods. I don’t and I’m not sure why. So many questions, but no answers… Did the captain of the Titanic cry?

Maybe that is the answer. Maybe people who choose to believe in a god need the security of a convenient answer, even if it is divorced from the mysticism of organized religion. Here’s what I’ve been thinking lately: if there is a god, it doesn’t interfere. I know that I’m grounded, possibly for life, in the dogma of Christianity, but maybe I can disprove the existence of a god logically. Something to do with infinite compassion for all living things and the existence of suffering.

Like I said, delirium.

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