SeanTerrill.com » grammar

Eireann go Brew

webmaster — Wed, 17 Mar 2010 18:05:37 +0000

This is truly essential reading for anyone who’s Irish, anyone who wishes they were Irish, anyone who enjoys etymology, and everyone else:

Faith & Begorrah, Sodom & Gomorrah

History records the day as one of extreme feasting and stuffing oneself to the gills, getting full and fat to last the remaining days of Lent. And, of course, the means of washing all that food down was…now don’t jump ahead here…beer. A lot of beer. Lots and lots of beer. A full day of food and beer, and more food and beer, and more beer, and more beer. Did I say more beer? And all that drinking led to a lot of sex–wanted, forced and indifferent–between a lot of unmarrieds, various swinging parties, and more than a few adulterous hook-ups. Orgy, anyone?

I, however, celebrated by bottling both batches of the Caramel Camel Amber Ale. Have I mentioned how much I hate bottling?

It's good to know that today's youth aren't totally ignorant of tradition.

The Horror

webmaster — Fri, 29 May 2009 17:29:59 +0000

Somehow, I don’t think they meant “you are right to continue…”

You're doing it wrong.

How Was This Not Already Online?

webmaster — Sun, 17 May 2009 05:26:55 +0000

I’ve started watching Aaron Sorkin’s other show, The West Wing. It’s pretty good. You just don’t get enough typo humor in primetime.

Things I Hate #3: Units vs. Quantities

webmaster — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 18:31:29 +0000

Sort of continuing the theme that the Internet is making everyone dumber, here are a couple gems from the Northern Brewer forums:

Fermenting Degrees?

Ok…my keg and CO2 tank have been in the fridge since last night and when I woke up this morning the PSI was around 425 with my fridge around 29 degrees.

Did you spot the common mistake? “Degrees” and “PSI” are units. (And “degree” isn’t even technically a unit – is it degrees Celsius, degrees Brix, degrees of Kevin Bacon? But I know I’ll never win that fight.) What they meant to use were the corresponding quantities of temperature and pressure, respectively. You could argue that this is a relatively minor issue; I ask, relative to what? Especially on the internet, where your prospective audience is global, confusion over units can be devastating. A European scientist under the age of, say, 45 might not even know what a “PSI” is.

Fuck you, people who confuse units with quantities.

Is the Internet Killing the Written Word?

webmaster — Fri, 27 Mar 2009 00:32:34 +0000

Yuri turned me on to this band Emanuel and The Fear. (Caution – MySpace link) Apparently his roommate Jeff plays with them, and I have to say they are unabashedly kick-ass. Sort of a Polyphonic Spree meets John Mayer thing, but then again what do I know about music?

Anyway, they have a track called “We’re All Alright Tonight”, which is the sort of thing that, even online, makes my eyes stop scanning across the page. I checked M-W, which is about as authoritative a source as there can be on (American) English, and they have this to say:

The one-word spelling alright appeared some 75 years after all right itself had reappeared from a 400-year-long absence. Since the early 20th century some critics have insisted alright is wrong, but it has its defenders and its users. It is less frequent than all right but remains in common use especially in journalistic and business publications. It is quite common in fictional dialogue, and is used occasionally in other writing.

… which I love, if only for the phrase “alright is wrong”. So they take the (probably sensible) position that if people use it, it’s a word, which is about all you can say for English. As opposed to, for example, French, where there’s a governing body that regulates the language and if they don’t call it a word, then it isn’t, no matter how often people use it. (Is it spelled “blog” or “blogue”? We don’t know yet.)

So this one is probably more or less harmless, but there is some downright terrible spelling floating around on the webotubes. A lot of it is the run-of-the-mill stuff that’s been bothering teachers (they don’t call it “grammar school” for nothing) for decades. Their/there/they’re, accept/except, affect/effect, that sort of thing. But now that almost everyone has a spellchecker running in the background (finally) there are some words that just plain get misused. Probably the one that bothers me the most, just because it’s so prevalent, is “defiantly” in place of¹ “definitely”. Misspellings of “definitely” are nothing new on the blagoblog; there’s even a website dedicated to it. No, this is the result of someone making a typo, accepting the spellchecker’s change, and then not realizing he’s used the wrong word. It is, in some ways, worse than a simple misspelling. The other one I’ve seen more than a few times is “acutely” where people mean “actually”. Come on, that isn’t even close.

So please people, when using your spellcheck (and again, thank you from the bottom of my heart for that), don’t blindly accept its revisions. Take a second to make sure it’s the word you actually meant to use. If you right-click on it, I bet you’ll find out you even have a dictionary to help. Better yet, you could stop using words you don’t know, but I know that’s a lot to ask.

Grammar Nazi out.

1. I had actually typed “instead of”, which is a good example of two words becoming one over time, and one of the reasons that “alright” doesn’t get my goat as much as it used to. But I realized that using “stead” in this context implies a replacement of function, which is clearly not the case – the words being used are simply incorrect. Hence “in place of”. I just thought you might like to know.

Môtiers

webmaster — Sun, 27 May 2007 20:42:01 +0000

We’re in a hostel in Interlaken called Balmer’s – some ridiculous 170-bed hangout where the girl at the front desk doesn’t speak German and the shuttle you from one of their three bars to the next at precise times with the promise of 2-for-1 drinks. Not my kind of place, but it’s about the best deal in town.

Môtiers is very much in the French-speaking part of Switzerland. It was refreshing to be able to communicate, and (according to Ronny) the Francophone Swiss are too proud to speak anything else, so we actually got to get in some French practice. When we got into town, all the stores were closed and everyone at lunch at the local café, so we joined in. Lunch was escargots, chevre salad, and the local absinthe, which is very good. We picked up a liter, just in case. On the whole, it seems to be a pleasant place; the tourism is low-key enough so as to be unobtrusive. Definitely a small town though, and apparently without that notorious Swiss reserve – lots of the people we passed said a cheerful “Bonjour!”

Saturday Ronny needed to study, so we poked around Bern for a few hours, found a giant chess set, and (predictably, with Yuri involved) wasted 90 minutes. Yuri won, albeit with a couple mulligans. Otherwise, we spent a lot of the time walking along the Aare River, which is fast-moving and unbelievably clear for someone accustomed to the Mississippi and Wabash. Swimming would be a hoot. If we come back later in the summer it will definitely be on the agenda. Later that night we went to a “barbecue” with some friends of Ronny’s husband Urs. The wine and beer were flowing pretty freely, and on top of it being a generally good time I think that Yuri and I were able to at least somewhat improve their opinions of Americans as we practiced our French and Spanish while picking up the odd word or two of German. I suppose it stands to reason that the fiercely neutral Swiss would balk at the concept of preemptive war, but the truth is that Bush and Iraq come up all the time. It’s as if Europeans feel the need to tell me personally that no, this is not OK, and would I please go home and tell my friends.

On the way home we drunk-dialed Yuri’s mom.

Môtiers town square

Swiss graffiti is erudite

On the banks of the Aare

Eating raclette

Any minute now...

Ronny and Urs

New Beginnings

webmaster — Sat, 12 Jun 2004 15:01:33 +0000

I’m pretty sure that beginnings always have to be new, but this is far from the worst logical contradiction (although “logical contradiction” is a pretty damn good one too) you’ll see today.

Given that you are the sort of person who is inclined to read my blog, you’re probably 1) upset, 2) curious, or 3) indifferent about the fact that I haven’t written anything for the better part of two months. This is partly due to laziness on my part, but mostly because nothing all that exciting happened between the end of school and my arrival in Oak Ridge, Tennessee. Not to mention that everyone who does read this thing, i.e. Irina, knew about everything I did in St. Louis approximately thirty seconds after it happened.

WHAT FOLLOWS IS THE ILL-ADVISED ATTEMPT BY A BORDERLINE SCHIZOPHRENIC WITH A PASSION FOR ENGLISH GRAMMAR TO CONDENSE SIX WEEKS’ HAPPENINGS INTO A SERIES OF CONCISE BUT LINGUISTICALLY STIMULATING PARAGRAPHS. SHOULD YOU READ IT YOU WILL ALMOST CERTAINLY SUFFER MALADIES INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO BOREDOM, HYSTERICAL LAUGHTER, TEMPORARY PARALYSIS OF THE RIGHT SIDE OF THE BODY, CLICKING JAW, BERIBERI, ATHLETE’S FOOT, AND A DESIRE TO DRINK DIET SODA.

I’ m cur ren tly e xp erime nting with w ays to r ender te xt ill egibl e ( see rea ding selection) . Being a geek , or at lea s t a ge ek wann abe, th i s t akes t he form of a s cr ipt th at wh acks the spac e b ar for me at r an dom i nt e r vals b etw een zer o an d one sec on ds . Thi s p aragra p h has b e e n typ ed wit h t h e script runn ing so th at y ou ma y get a sen se of h ow b iza rre yet oddl y cool I a m.

Enough of that.

MYTHI NKING INTHI SMATT ERWAS INFOR MEDBY MYOBS ERVAT IONTH ATTEX TINCR YPTON OMICO NISRE NDERE DALLB UTILL EGIBL EATLE ASTFO CASUA LREAD INGBY MISPL ACING THESP ACESI NTHIS CASEF ORCRY PTOGR APHIC PURPO SESXX

Enough of that.

So, what have I been doing with myself?

As I intimated to Yuri recently, I’ve been developing a real appreciation for number theory of late. So before too long I’ll be a pathetic academic scoffing at people who don’t do “pure” math. Actually these little math phases of mine tend to coincide with an increase in my general paranoia level and the consequent interest in cryptography. I think I’m going to leave off there for now and go do some rock climbing. Peace.

Email

webmaster — Fri, 13 Feb 2004 05:00:56 +0000

Probably the most impressive thing I’ve ever written:

Brothers,

As many of you may have noticed, at some point this afternoon several doors

within the house went missing. Fortunately, they were discovered unharmed in

Thalmann’s… in the room at the end of the hall. Truly this is a prank for

the ages, and the legendary pranking prowess of the perpetrators will only

be magnified as its story is told and retold by generations of Taus. Should

the parties responsible for this prank, the intellect and wit of whom mere

words are inadequate to describe, deign once more to grace my doorway with

their presence and return my door to it’s rightful place within its jamb, I

can offer you my undying gratitude and admiration, lacking though those

meager rewards may be to men of your stature.

There is, however, another issue on which I cannot be so lenient. As those

mysterious, revered, and nigh immortal beings at whose feet we lay our

effusive but meager praise for a job well done are no doubt aware, attached

to my humble door, which I am not worthy of opening when compared to the

true gods among men who removed it from its hinges, was a small, utterly

insignificant plastic placard intended to convey the spirits of its

occupant, videlicet yours truly. Although a trifle and surely worthy of

reproach from titans of humor such as yourselves, it has brought me much joy

in the months it has graced my dwelling. Should it be even remotely within

the extraordinary means of you fine examples of humanity to return, I would

once more be eternally in your debt.

Yours most lovingly and respectfully,

Sean Terrill

What are friends for?

webmaster — Fri, 06 Feb 2004 04:53:46 +0000

A comedy in one act by Sean Terrill

Dramatis Personae:
Sean Terrill, a geek and all around device for man’s foibles
Ryan Abbott, a slightly less geekish Aerospace Engineering major

Ryan Abbott enters the room of Sean Terrill. Sean sits at his computer furiously blogging.

Ryan: Sterrill, I need a favor.
Sean: Yes…?
Ryan: Do you have any condoms?
Sean: Sure, blow the dust off and you should be good to go.

Exeunt omnes.