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Things you should never say at 1:00 AM:

“I’ll just watch one episode of ’24’ and then go to bed.”

I think I have a TV hangover.


I’m in kind of a weird place right now. I don’t mean at this exact moment, although I’m not exactly a bright ray of sanity; I just mean that for the past five weeks I’ve been in this weird holding pattern, like I’m sitting around waiting for something and I don’t even know what it […]

The Anderson County Redemption

In honor of my recent stint as a guest of East Tennessee’s finest, today’s blog entry will be written by “The Shawshank Redemption” narrator Morgan Freeman.

Strange things happen to a man when he staggers down a hallway at three in the morning, bleeding and damn near naked, and unexpectedly encounters an officer of the […]


Today FedEx brought me a new 7.1 MP digital camera and 1 GB SD card, and a 16x DVD burner.

I am so fsckin’ 1337.

Sittin’ on the Ladder

A public service announcement to women everywhere: my Y chromosome has rendered me immune to conversational subtlety. If you’ve spent three hours telling me how much you don’t like your boyfriend/fiancĂ©/husband, I will conclude that you do not, in fact, like him and are telling me as much to indicate that the way is clear […]

Spice died.

Things that make you go “yum”

I was just struck by the fact that although I have all the ingredients to make French toast (I’m pretty sure it’s just eggs and bread), and I like French toast, I’ve never actually made French toast.

Then I thought that there might be other ingredients and I wasn’t really sure if you were supposed […]


I could have gotten laid tonight.

But did I? Of course not. And why? Because she’s engaged, and I’m a nice guy, and nice guys really do finish last. If you’re 12 years old and you’re reading this, you give that shit up right now. Women are not your friends. They don’t even particularly like […]

Free Song

If you have iTunes, click this link:

If you don’t have iTunes, download it and then click the link.

An Open Letter to Tennessee Motorists

I really am going to try to post stuff regularly from now on.

Anyway, last weekend I went to visit Yuri at Chapel Hill, which is amazing. If they had an engineering program it would be paradise. I’m hoping that’s why I’ve been so tired all week. I can barely drag myself out of bed […]